You know the adage . . .
Sometimes we don’t get what we want; we get what we need.
Over Thanksgiving break, what I needed was to remember what it felt like to have no plans. No appointments, no obligations—just wide-open days stretching ahead. I’d blocked out a whole week for this staycation, coordinating with the kids’ time off from school and my in-laws’ visit from Fargo.
My intention was clear: keep things simple. I'd do my best to ignore the housework and focus on the people I love who were there for a short time to visit.
But as enjoyable as it sounded to rest, I struggled to find comfort in doing little while I was home with time to burn. I found myself managing urges to dive headfirst into activities—seeing friends, tackling projects, filling every corner of open space with plans. Even fun to-dos can drain you when it’s always go, go, go.
To resist the urges to be busy that arose, I reminded myself that if it feels challenging to truly unwind and do less, it's likely all the more important to do so.
I was determined to chill. I kept my Google calendar a blank canvas, a rare sight, save for one friendly coffee date with Marti and a round of pickleball. Other than that? Nothing.
No appointments. No stress. No need to go anywhere to honor my intention of taking it easy, unplugging, and letting the days unfold naturally.
The challenge of slowing down
As much as I like to think I’m naturally “flowy” in life, my workdays are tightly wound around the clock. Hopping from one commitment to another can make it hard to feel present. And when you’re used to running on go-mode, shifting gears to slow—or stopping entirely—feels foreign, even uncomfortable.
What I needed that week was to embrace “easy living,” to reconnect with the art of doing very little in good company. To stay grounded and not get pulled into busy work (hello, never-ending house tasks), I started asking myself a simple question: What would feel most nourishing for my mind, body, and spirit right now?
The answer, time and again, was: just chill. Be here now. (Thank you, Ram Dass.)
The rhythm of stillness
For a week, I surrendered to slow mornings and unhurried days. I still woke early but rushed nowhere. Instead, I lingered over lattes with my father-in-law as the morning sun crept into the living room. We’d sit quietly, lost in our books, or fall into deep conversations, savoring the kind of time that feels expansive and timeless. The dogs slept at our feet, the fire crackled, and the world outside seemed to move at half-speed.
A new rhythm emerged—vacation mode. The pace was so different from my usual whirlwind that I nearly forgot it existed. It was like stepping into a bubble, a brief pause before the rush of the holiday season.
The gift of letting go was most evident on Thanksgiving Day. For once, I stepped back and let someone else lead. The day unfolded as a team effort. I made my contributions—two pies and a simple green bean dish—and left the rest in the capable hands of my family. Brent whipped up his signature salmon bake and mushroom gravy. Nana handled a mountain of mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce with Wyatt’s help. The kids decorated the table.
By the time we sat down for dinner, the tree was up, the lights twinkled, and the meal felt like a collective triumph. Afterward, full and content, we sprawled on the couch, waiting for pie and ice cream to follow.
What I thought I wanted—and what I received
I thought I wanted a detailed itinerary, a plan to control the outcomes. It’s a habit—helpful in work and managing a household, but less so when the goal is to relax and enjoy. What I received instead was a reminder of the beauty of doing less—less structure, less certainty, less activity—so I could experience more.
A wide-open week gave me the chance to let go, lean into stillness, and find joy in the simplest pleasures: time with loved ones, the warmth of connection, the quiet delight of being unhurried.
5 Ways to Embrace Stillness and Connection:
Schedule Space for Nothing. Reserve unstructured time in your calendar to recharge and reset.
Tune Into Your Needs. Ask yourself, “What feels most nourishing right now?” and honor the answer.
Share the Load. Let others take the reins sometimes—it fosters teamwork and deepens relationships.
Celebrate the Simple. Find joy in small, meaningful moments like quiet mornings or heartfelt conversations.
Discover Your Flow. Experiment with different rhythms until you find the balance that feels just right for you.
There’s no one right way to spend time; it’s about discovering what balance feels right for you in the moment.
This week reminded me how nourishing it is to linger, to truly listen, and to savor life as it comes.
What a gift!
What helps you to slow down, accept what is, and enjoy the moment?
Whatever it is, keep following your curiosity and engage wholeheartedly. You do that, you'll be forging a pathway that is true and right for you.
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